Where are you from?

When meeting someone new, are you also asking, "Where are you from?"

I bet you have been asked this question a zillion times when you arrived somewhere.

But, I learned over the years: This question might be offending someone.

First, it's incredibly complicated to answer for people who have made a home away from their birth/home country and/or those with dual nationality parents.

Second, we make assumptions based on our biases and how we perceive the other person. What do we know about their (cultural) identity, journey, and/or struggles with this question?

You might find these resources interesting:

• The HBR article "What's wrong with asking where you're from". The author writes, "For those of us who already feel "different" in a given space, being asked where we're from carries implicit assumptions about our race, caste, ethnicity, nationality, etc. Often, it translates into: You don't seem to (already) belong. It validates existing beliefs about social identities and can be quite patronizing."

• The Ted Talk "Don't ask me where I'm from, ask me where I'm local". Taiye Selasi proposes a three-step test in this fascinating talk: rituals, relationships, restrictions.

• A fun 2 min video take on this question.

I struggle to answer this question myself.

I often resort to saying. "I'm originally from Austria, but currently, I call London my base. But in the future - who knows". 😆

What experiences do you have with the question, "Where are you from?"

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